Hi folks! If there’s even anyone still out there . . .

It’s been a long, long time. That’s nothing unusual for this blog, of course, but I realised when glancing back over the most recent posts this week that I didn’t even write anything for International Women’s Day these past three years! 😱 That used to be the one day a year I could think of something to write. Yikes.

But everything in the world has changed in that time, hasn’t it? I mean, that’s not even a question. Everything has been, and continues to be, super weird and The Bad Place-ish and wrong-timeline-get-back-in-your-Delorian-and-fix-this-Marty.

So I haven’t written anything here in, like, almost two years.

Writing this kind of blog is a bit like a friendship, really. You leave things a bit long, then you feel bad because the first thing you’ll have to say to the friend is that you keep meaning to do something . . . except then you don’t. And the longer you leave it, the bigger the excuse has to be.

You begin to wonder if you even have a need for the friendship these days. I mean, if it’s gone this long, maybe you’ve just grown apart. Maybe you should just let it go.

But this blog has never been about anything other than me just writing what’s on my mind. I don’t really mind whether anyone looks at it. It’s like a diary that I don’t care if anyone finds and reads.

And the reason I never post is because I’ve either got nothing to say, or everything to say. Both cases are daunting and problematic when it comes to putting words down, and both result in absolute avoidance.

The last time I tried to post something, I started drafting about my experience with covid, which I had in February 2021. It was pre-vaccine, pre-delta, and it brought me right up to the end of Death’s driveway. Not quite to the door, you understand. More like a slow drive-by that, for a short time, involved me thinking I might be about to pull in. I did not, but the experience left me juuuust traumatised enough that writing about it made me feel panicky and weird, so I deleted it.

And now, here we are, one day post-International Women’s Day, and as always at this time of year, I have many, many thoughts and feelings. Too many. I can’t pull them into something cohesive. So I won’t try. Not today.

All I’m doing with this post is saying, I still need this friendship, Bloggie. I will try to pay more attention to you. We’re still friends.